shut up shut up shut up

I'm not sure why I miss you so much suddenly

but I do

I read through my previous blogs and now they sound so ridiculous

Everything I've been working on seems tacky and trashy and unexceptional and nothing is good enough

All of the music I've been enjoying lately sounds like garbage and I don't feel it and I can't understand why I even liked it so much to begin with

The friendships I have created on a fragile foundation of charm are truly just another distraction and not as great and wonderful and valuable as I made myself believe

I hate it when people do something shitty thinking it's the right thing to do when in actuality it's completely wrong and fucking stupid but when you try to explain it to them they never understand because it's all they've ever known and you get so frustrated and confused that you start to question everything that you've learned

I hate people and I hate the way they act and the way they think and the way they treat each other

Assholes breed their children to become assholes and it's not their fault but they break hearts and they rip away peoples' faith in humanity and they don't get that they're doing it and even if they ever did the damage is done

and I had a draft that I was going to post from earlier this afternoon and when I look at it now I see how stupid and superficial and hopeful I sound and that's not true to what I really feel

I feel like shit

and I feel like you will never come home



please come home