splendor up your ass

"I'm never one to believe that happy endings happen to me. I've always thought my life would end tragically, with my heart left unfulfilled, like Sylvia Plath. I hate movies that wrap things up like that so neatly. I hate it when the last scene's a sweet one, a reunion of some kind or a surprise appearance by the one the main character's been waiting for.

"But when you think about it, even when the one I've been waiting for pops up again, and everything seems so well and good, things are still totally ambiguous. Weeks, months, years from now, he could land me with his catchphrase again and bolt. And I'll do this dance all over again.

"So when you see this scene, the one where he comes up to me with candy and a hug, remember that it's not over. We haven't reached a happy ending yet, if we will at all. I've got a lot more to deal with until this guy grows up, and then, I might have to learn the steps to a whole new dance. And if he never grows up, maybe I'll have to get off the floor for good.

"But for now, just enjoy the feelgood ending. Pretend that we aren't real people dealing with this real situation. That we're just scripted and set to act in this way. That it's just a movie, and no one has gone through this before, or is going through it now.

"Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better, and I'm not saying that bitterly. Life's just too short to worry about complicated shit like this. It really is."